When you hurt your loved one’s feelings, how often do you “repair?”
Research has shown that when a parent does a “repair” (e.g. apologizing, empathizing, hugging, etc.) after hurting a child’s feelings, it helps with the child’s long-term development.
All parents make mistakes (e.g. yelling at child after a bad day) but research indicates that the mistakes aren’t usually detrimental. Instead, they may be helpful training for future relationships.
The problem arrives when the parent doesn’t “repair.” This teaches the child that they should not repair future relationships, but rather, let them slowly degrade.
The same concepts are true for romantic relationships. All couples argue but those that make an effort to “repair” have deeper bonds.
Take the time to “repair” after you make a mistake.